Rwanda needs effective sex education

Emmanuel MUNGWARAKARAMA
Date: February, 15th, 2007

Not having enough information or having bad information about sex can put you at risk. Youth mainly get information about sex from their friends, but they are not the most reliable source of information.

Good communication, open relationships, and the will to make good
solid decisions are critical to staying healthy and meeting your
goals.

The family is one of the most powerful sources of messages about values. When parents are silent about important issues such as sex, youth often explore it on their own. This makes it even more important for parents to be the first and most reliable source of information for their children. A parent is in a good position to support and share knowledge, beliefs and attitudes with children and teach them the skills they will need to make their own decisions.

Youth today are facing some of the same challenges that parents/guardians may have faced as a child as well as dealing with newer issues like HIV/AIDS. Youth are looking for parental leadership, guidance and understanding. In today's world, it is a matter of life and death. Parents can be the role model that helps children stay safe from harm.

A child's sexual life begins at birth. Exploring body parts and those of other children, masturbation, sexual desire, and dating, are all normal, healthy parts of sexual development. Parents may be uncomfortable realizing that their children are sexual beings but they will develop sexually with or without their advice or assistance.
They could greatly benefit from parent's experience, guidance, and
knowledge about sexuality rather than getting their information from
peers.

How we assess and learn to reduce sexual risk is closely linked to our values. Our values help us to make decisions that are true to what we
believe in. Values can help youth resist peer pressure. For example, one may place a high value on more traditional cultural beliefs, such
as believing it is taboo to talk about sex with youth, or that it is
wrong for youth to engage in sex before marriage. This might prevent
a parent from reaching out to offer guidance to children about sexuality. Yet consider the value of their life- the value of staying healthy so that they can get reach their goals.

Not having sex can be a sign of emotional maturity. It requires maturity and honesty and integrity for a person to resist pressure and to make a decision that is consistent with personal values and beliefs.

Choosing not to have sex completely eliminates the risk of Sexually Transmitted Infections including HIV. It is the only method that is A 100%- effective way of preventing unwanted pregnancy. It is the 100%
safest choice and is 100% free of side effects.

Delaying sex may change a relationship in a positive way. A couple can get to know each other better, develop a stronger friendship by building mutual interests. It allows the couple to explore a wider range of feelings and ways to express love.

Some people have sex, not because they want to, but because they think
they have to for others to accept them. Pressure from peers to behave like them can be very strong and difficult to resist. However, if you stand up for yourself and what you believe people often respect you and like you more. It is often better to wait until you are ready to handle the commitments and responsibilities that go along with a sexual relationship.

Don't be afraid to set limits in your relationships. If you start to have sex, you need to know the consequences. What you do has an impact not only on you, but also your friends and family. Saying no to sex does not mean you are saying no to the relationship. You are saying no to something you are not ready for-possibly a pregnancy, a sexually transmitted infection, a serious commitment, or risking your future plans and well being.